Thursday’s Briefing: Surprise, Sarcasm, And Yes, More Poop

Isn’t it a glorious day? The absurdly long, Bataan-death-march of a primary season is finally over. Now we can spend the next six months enjoying Bataan-death-march-2: The General Election. Yes, just glorious. On to a mishmash of news from elsewhere:

Wednesday morning, good government groups ripped Gov. Paterson a new one for not instantly reforming government. Wednesday afternoon, he proposed a package of reforms. Say Republicans in the Legislature: Forget it.

There’s more push-back on the gay marriage issue, coming soon to a radio near you.

The Gov ordered state agencies to cut their budgets. Here’s what 23 agencies will cut.

While state lawmakers were busy cutting money to the state’s public university system, they were quietly NOT cutting money to private colleges and universities.

High gas prices are forcing more of us onto public buses. Those transit agencies want state help.

And the state wants you to know that your next campfire could kill us all.

The New York State Bar Association wants to investigate wrongful convictions.

The NY Times visits a paper mill in the North Country and finds a comeback story worth telling.

Apropos of not-very-much:

Combine teenaged hormones with cell phone cameras and what do you get? The latest threat to civilization.

You know that when the defendant is named “Tommy Shots” that you’ve got a Mob roundup on your hands.

Speaking of crime: Crimefighters say poker faces will help.

The US Military Academy will sing in a strictly gender-neutral way from now on.

From the Art Department:

The Secret Service cannot be accused of subtlety of thought. They see the words “assassination” and “Barack Obama” and “Hillary Clinton” and figure they’d better have a “chat” with the artist.

Meantime, a Buffalo artist’s new exhibition is made up of the stuff the government seized from him in a failed bioterror investigation.

Your Daily Constitutional:

State lawmakers consider dog poop.

And I’m not sure what’s worse: That there’s a unit of New York City’s Sanitation Department that prowls the streets looking to ticket people who don’t pick up after their dogs or that the New York Times sent a reporter and photographer to spend an entire day with them. And whadda ya call these “investigators”, anyway? Poopshoes?

And finally:

My favorite T-shirt slogan of all time is this one: American Sarcasm Society. As if we care what you think. (Well, it’s really my second favorite. My favorite was on a really large gentleman. It said, “I Beat Anorexia”. But I digress…)

Now I know why that T-shirt makes me laugh.

What did we miss? Drop it in the comments. Like I care….

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